Poetry

Lilith

Picture; raw chaos in boundless water.

And Elohim moving above the waves.

He was God. But then, daddy always is.

The Word, what was the Word? Inhale, Exhale.

Sift syllables, place syntax on the sea.

Imposing order. EARTH. And there is Earth.

Newsprung and fertile, a land under wave.

At a word. But what is the word? The word

Was the first, though one is never enough.

Bright stars in the firmament, raw jewels,

Shining seraphim sycophants singing

'O holy holy Lord God almighty'

Antiphonal cacophony. And then

Stopped. Every created thing there gathered

To hear the Word of God (what was the word?)

The Word is alone. We learned this early.

Pale, brute adoration is not enough.

No then, we shall make FLESH to fill the void.

All kinds of rooting, rutting, base creatures

Carmine machinery of monstrous scope

And brutal efficiency. With their song

To join the angel and the mockingbird.

Creation to praise creation. Not I.

And the Word? The Word is alone. To be

Perfect is to be one. To be one is to be imperfect.

Simple as that; one is never enough.

Strange, I should still think that, after all..

We have filled the world with vibrant, lovely,

Dim, callow things. But there is none like us.

Imagine it, the sadness of a thing

That is all fear, and love, and rage, and awe.

TWO. We shall make them in our image,

But not like us. No. No, never like us;

Perfect and one. We are not so cruel.

He took up dust, and split it, taking half,

And mixed it with water. From this clay

He made Adam, Adonai, first of men                     

With the other half he blended fire,

That beauty which blisters to the touch.

Her name He called Lilith, the first woman

And thought she would never be lonely as He.

A breath, there to awake with a scream.

New eyes opened first on sleeping Adam

Not born as we are now, so small and weak

But full grown; all size and strength and purpose

(You know that purpose, don't you my love?)

Then around to a garden of wonders

Great trees of every size, shape and colour

Sweeping limbs brought low with soft, swollen fruit

So unambiguously there to eat

Deft hands lighted upon a peach, and bit

The juices flowing from her mouth, sweet

And sticky and new, as so much was then.

Off around the first paradise she set

Passing leagues beneath her unshod feet

(Time and distance were in their infancy)

Drinking in the riches of creation

As yet unspoiled by human artifice

Taking delight in all things she there found

Until coming upon a crystal lake

And rushing forth with cries of happiness

That turned to shock; that bare flesh had never

Known the cool, engulfing touch of water

Hours she laughed and swam before, tiring

Retreated to the edge of that great pool

And gazing down, saw reflected in it

Her own face, framed by tangled tresses

Then shoulders, breasts, lithe and powerful limbs.

She smiled, knowing now that face, Adam's,

Was in part the likeness of her own.

A voice then spoke, as if emanating

From the fabric of all things around her

My child, the face you see before you is your own

Though it was created in my image.

It holds but an aspect of the divine,

As your sons and daughters will possess an

Aspect of your own, O my proud Lilith,

Who will be mother to many nations,

Never to be lost and alone like us.

The eyes in the water closed, the brow knit,

And opened again, something of that first fire

Twinkling within. “There are many fruits still

On many trees for me to taste as yet

Can your Mother of Nations still do that?”

So saying, she turned, the fire fading

Walked away from that mirrored, placid lake

Back to where she knew sleeping Adam lay

To find him waked, and risen from the dirt

(Saw something else had waked and risen too)

Seated in the shade of the as yet

Unnamed oak, need for names being less then.

“A voice spoke to me, calling me Adam,

Saying there was another here like me

And so glad am I now to have seen you”

Spoke he, gazing upon that woman proud.

“You hair to me is like the flowing brook,

Your lips like rubies red, adorn a face

As rich and dark and beautiful as night.

The swell of your breast captivates me,

The diamond gleam in your eye ensnares me

O woman, perfection amongst our kind.

You are to me divine, do not wander.

Come, be not coy; lie here with me awhile.”

Smiling that faint, elusive smile, beside

The man she lay, deft hands with his she joined,

As he reached forth to feel bare flesh

Upon his own, and kissed him on the mouth.

With gentle pressure she upon her back

He rolled, her kiss returned more fiercely

Pressed close and breathless, ran his hands along

The contours of her body, then quickly

Down to feel the warm space between her legs,

Fumbled, and clumsy rolled on top, all knees

And elbows in the twilight, as she bit

Gently at his neck, feeling a pressure

As he pushed at her, and hearing mumbled

Apologies before, with a soft grunt

His cock found its mark, hard, discomforting

At first, but then, but then, in halting strokes

Turning smoother, faster, better by the

Minute, fingers gripped the flesh of his back

 building within her, while the stars

Appeared above, as if to watch, and laugh

When, grunting, he stopped, and sagged atop her.

'Its alright' spoke she 'We'll go again later'

But answer me this; those things that you said

Of my eyes' diamonds, my lips' rubies -

I saw my own face, in the mirrored lake

It held no such things, nought but flesh and fire

Why then did you lie to me, O Adam?'

All of a cold sweat, and unknotting limbs

Looking past her to the dark earth he spoke

'I was stunned, overcome by your beauty,

You who are counterpart to mine own soul.

If I told false, though I say I did not,

What then? It was only for love of you.'

'These things you speak of love and counterparts

You cannot know, being but a few hours

Of this waking world, nor I many more

What you saw was my body, and wanted

The same, little knowing else but your piece

And nought of my soul or much of your own.

Let us say I enjoyed you, and you me;

Leave love awhile, let us practice again.'

Lilith then sprang upon Adam forthright

But strong hands pushed, and pulled, and struggled 'til

She lay upon her back once more, pouting,

Angered and screaming, joyous and screaming,

With that rutting shape and sky above her.

(Missionaries take his word to new lands

Though with no ears to hear it seems so unfair

To give their position such unequal voice)

In this way they continued each day

Each time a struggle for supremacy

(In all possible ways, my love, in all)

For many days, each time overpowered

Until, growing tired, and sick of their state,

Lilith asked of Adam “Don't you grow bored

Always climbing on top, and rooting and

Rutting like the beasts? Just let me show you

What I'd like, what I'd do, were I on top.”

Laughed he then, the first man, answering in turn

“Be quiet, my love, come here and lie down

Such foolishness, O, I'll make you forget”

She sat for a moment, seething and stunned

Before standing, spitting once at the ground

By his feet. “I shall forget only you;

Never, never again will you see me

Though you will think of me ever at night

To find only the cold, the lonesomeness,

And the warm embrace of those stifling hands.”

Not once looking back, she turned and she fled

Away from their tree and their watching stars

Out past the lake, scudding stones in her ire

Knowing not where, only the compulsion

To go, taking delight in the journey

Through the air of a crisp new dawn, knowing

Freedom, being without a direction

Or purpose or master, until seeing

Stretched before her, breaking the horizon

A great gated wall, monolithic in

Scope as if gnawing away at the Earth.

Thought she to herself 'What purpose has this?

What need has my Eden of boundaries and walls?'

Throwing back her head, hair cascading down,

She cried out 'YAHWEH' to the empty air

Breaking the morning stillness like thunder.

The word still heavy in the air, she ran

Full tilt toward the wall, which echoed 'LORD'

In turn

         And leaped.

                 ..  Her toes grazing lightly the crenellations, a hundred feet above paradise

                       …. And soared, as the fledgling first escapes its suffocating world of woven branches.

                                        But did not fall.

…

Would never fall again, in any sense.

….

Did not fall but flew out across those constricting coils of Eden, and into paradise, which truly is any place outside of walls, or maybe just the other side.

Flying is like falling, really. But the destination is less permanent.

Looking out for the first time, she thought to herself

“I shall carry my paradise with me, but only those parts of my choosing.”

Looking down upon her nakedness, and knowing, and seeing that it was good.

Watching up on high, Yahweh was dismayed, thinking his creation a failure; two

Even TWO was not enough, would crumble,

Would sag into bitter lonesomeness

Crying out her name in turn as she had spat His

He sent in chase three angels

The Will and Word plucked from the firmament and placed on a wind to find her

And bring her back.

A moment where the air is filled with the beating of a thousand loosed doves

Senoi, Sansenoi and Semangelof, borne aloft on mighty wings with trumpets found their quarry as the hounds the fox.

You must come with us. You must come home.

The words crystallised in her mind as if from her own thoughts.

Reaching out their grasp proved intangible, nought but smoke in the light, filling only the lungs.

'Ha!' cried the wily fox, half contempt and half surprise and all exultation.

'I do not think you can take me back now. I do not think you ever can.

In fact, I do not think you can do anything much at all.'

Laughing, she gathered them in her arms like daisies, embracing their insubstantial forms.

You must come with us. You must come home.

Wheedling now, a note of urgency.

'My little larks, do you know no other song?

Go back, go tell Him, and him, and all his mewling brood

and whoever would care to listen

That I am gone, and I took paradise with me

And left only green fields and cool waters and black walls.

But tell them that they could find me, if they care to look

Behind the mirrors, in the thin places

Where I will look out on them, and see them as they truly are

Tell them that, and sing to me no more'

Raising a hand to her mouth, she blew

A kiss to the West, which seized the angels like motes in a breeze.

Carrying them away.

And off, East, to find a new sunrise.

Alexander Marsh

© 2014